My boyfriend recently turned 22 on October 3rd and on the 4th I threw my boyfriend a surprise party.
Around August was when I decided to throw him one, so this was in the works for a while. He had been talking about some rough childhood memories and I decided that the kind and caring man I love so much deserved a party to show him how much everyone loved him. My boyfriend hasn’t had the best life and he deserves better than the hand he’s been dealt. If you have read my previous posts you know about his family and how his mom treats everyone like dirt. I just feel so sad because the childhood I had was full of great parties, loving holidays, and warmth… his wasn’t. Sure, he had parties when he was little but in comparison to what I’ve experienced they weren’t full of the love and care mine were. I’m not talking about the size or money spent but the love and time spent to create and give. So I became determined to create an event that showcased how much I loved him and how much everyone else did too.
My mother and I planned it to be at a bar and have pizza and drinks. We would keep it simple and just expect everyone to be there at 7 to have fun. I did the inviting and overall planning, my mom did the buying and cupcake making. I even invited his work friends, very sneakily I might add! Not everyone I invited came, and not everyone who said they would come came. (Which kinda pisses me off). I still appreciate all the people who did come and I love how successful the night was.
My boyfriend thought we were going to the bar to pick up money from my mom, so when we went inside and everyone was there he was just shocked. He had been expecting a surprise, but he didn’t know exactly what. Once he had made all his rounds and everyone had laughed and shared stories about how we tricked him, he hugged me so hard. He held me in front of everyone and just about cried he was so happy. Every picture I took of him that night he was smiling and I’m so glad I could do that for him. We made so many memories with the people we love and we gave my boyfriend a night of pure giving that he hadn’t experienced in a long time.
This experience made me think about love and how we show love. I’m a very giving and vocal person, so gifts and paragraphs of adoration are my thing. I have a hard time with showing physically how much I love someone, touching and hugging isn’t my forte. My boyfriend on the other hand is quiet and shows his appreciation through touch and hugs. I feel as if it is unfair to compare these two different types of expressions and expect one person to be more one or the other if they have a hard time of it. Sure, that person can work on it, but that doesn’t mean they will be able to change their immediate form of love. People were telling my boyfriend that he now had to top my surprise party when he proposed to me. I don’t agree. He doesn’t have to do anything but show he loves me in his own way, that’s the best. When we expect others to adhere to our wishes or do what we think they should do, it only causes disappointment. However my boyfriend shows his love to me is fine and I will never expect certain ideals from him other than being treated well.